Tuesday Morning Hangover Finale

“I just won the 2012 Elite League Championship; what am I going to do now?! I’m going to Disney World!!! #2012superbowl #2009rematch #champ

Speech!

Tony Dungy once told me, "when you win say very little and when you lose say even less..." I'm going to follow that strategy but I can't end the season without giving a few thank you's: 

(My Men...) HB2K12

Arian Foster gave his entire offensive line Segways for the outstanding year they provided him. Yeah...members of my "HB2K12" year have my Twitter follow-ship (yes I made that up) forever...2012 Roster...you might be the best team I ever had or will have...

And the winner is...

Heartbreak Kid (13-0) 131.38 - Gotham Knights (9-4) 124.62

It was a high scoring (unexpected), close game (expected) and this week wasn't any different with in-game injuries, starting the wrong players and surprising blow up players. An all around good game and great season. If my body is found in a field somewhere later this week, look for Justin... 

Flashback 2009

Nathan won the 2008 Elite Championship so when I won it in 2009, it only made sense to bring his sister along with me to collect my first belt. (I still have that belt actually) but now I'll just take the trophy!

Final Round... #Fight

Thirteen Weeks. Two Playoff Rounds. It all comes down to this...Superbowl Sunday. It's a rematch of the 2009 season. Heartbreak Kid (13-0) vs. Gotham Knights (9-4). There are teams a lot of grudge matches in our league: Educators vs. Sesame Street Gang, Gotham Knights vs. Educators (anyone verse Educators, really...) However, I think we have our first true rivalry: Stay tuned...(but all of this is a big waste of time because the world ends tomorrow...)

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

“…the end of the season comes down to the classic DC comic debate: “Superman vs. Batman” #weekfifteen #playoffs

Round Two... #Fight

Heartbreak Kid 13-0 (Reece Valentine) vs. Limited Edition 8-5 (Nathan Graves)

Gotham Knights 9-4 (Justin Demps) vs. Sesame Street Gang 9-4 (Hery Diaz)



Just an observation: between these four GM's are six championship apperances and four rings through seven years... 

Tuesday Morning Hangover

Me: "Hey, let's go and see RG3!" Mary Q: "Okay! Is that a place?" #weekfourteen #firstround #playoffs

Round One... #Fight

Sons of Thunder 7-6 (Francois Crawford) vs. Limited Edition 8-5 (Nathan Graves) 

Sesame Street Gang (Hery Diaz) 9-4 vs. Prophets n Kings 7-6 (Jonathan Brassington)



In the West is the rematch of the 2008 Championship game and in the East it's the classic case of the veteran vs the rookie (to date only two GMs have won it all their rookie year: Mighty Men of Benjamin, 2007; Orange Crush, 2006)

Playoffs Start Now...

For the next month...none of us are boys. If I see you in the street, this is the look I'm giving you...

Hello Ladies,

This is when the year really gets rough. After 13 weeks of stressing, deliberating, researching, hoping, wishing, praying (and much, much hating), we finally arrive at the time when each team reaps what they've sown. When the division between the championship contenders and fishing gurus finally gets drawn. Everyone played extremely hard, and chased the after title glory with extreme tenacity (except Ghostface Velma, and oddly, Limited Expedition--who still squeaked out a playoff spot after a late season comeback). MUCH respect goes out to all who played this year, especially the The Bane--we've seen teams (note the previous two mentioned) who essentially give up after week 8 and become this year's "Sick As Cali" or "The Diplomats" or whatever Albert calls himself. Dude played his heart out, and I for one, respect that greatly.

Welp, enough of that.

The reality is, the lines have been drawn, and the strong have been separated from the weak (and Dan). As with each year, there can be only One (probably Me), and for the rest, it's time to give up, "Go home and be a family man".


~Bishop

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

Can we just all agree now that the first matter on the agenda this offseason will be to get rid of that stupid Snicker’s weekly, annoying trophy??? #weekthirteen

This is how we all feel now that the season is almost over...

Now to go back to our regular lives for another 38 weeks... 

Down and Out in KC

I know Dan is the resident Rain Man in our league, but numbers have always been interesting to me as well. My current record, while aesthetically and numerically pleasing as it may be, is a heart-wrenching 0-12. Sequential is not the word that came to mind at the beginning of the season when thinking about what my record would be in week 13.

It's been a tough year. Between investments that didn't turn out, bad trades, bad quarterback decisions, and being forced to read Hery's stories, I have had my share of Tuesday Morning Hangovers. However, there is one thing I will not do. I will not sulk into the background. I will not hang my head or throw in the towel. There is yet a Sunday on the horizon and I intend to put my best effort into winning as I have all season (and that sucks to admit). I saw a commercial featuring Herm Edwards, the old Jets coach, while watching Brees throw his 5th interception of the night and it put my mantra from this past season into words.

It's been a season. Better for some than others, but it's been fun playing with you guys again. As for the trophy, I'm getting accustomed to long distance relationships. I'll just have to wait and see her next year.

-Bane

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

This week is all about name dropping [Spoiler Alert] I’m not as close to these people as I would like to think I am… #weektwelve

And this is why Maucus is the Sith...lol

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

Me: “I love our league because we’re all boys and we all…” Francois: “…secretly hate each other…”

@reecevalentine: “We’re all boys but some guys I want them to lose EVERY week” (twitter status) @bishopdemps: “I don’t even want these dudes to be able to find matching socks when they get dressed ‘cuz of football.” (response via my tweet)

#weekeleven

The Results Are In!

The result are in boys after 17 trades in only 10 weeks I have spent hours doing the math(not really) and checking the list, checking it twice. To see who has really been naughty or nice in trades this year. so lets begin. Top 5

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

Extra, extra read all about it! But what should you read first!? The story here, the poll debate there, the comments everywhere! The page is alive and buzzing #week10

Tuesday Morning Special

I decided to take a break from my weekly "rants and raves" to establish something I believe belongs in our league (and had quite fun creating; we’ll add more terminology over the years). #weeknine

Girl Talk

Well, it seems like some of you ladies have been feeling "a little less than fresh" lately. Fortunately, The Bishop will take the time to explain the facts of life to you.

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

Star Wars. Episode V. Luke Skywalker finds out that the person he’s been fighting against has been his very own blood. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer” I’m adding another line, “but keep your family…even closer” #week8

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

"Ding Dong! The Witch is dead. Which old Witch? The Wicked Witch! Ding Dong! The Wicked Witch is dead." #weekseven

Week 7: East VS. West

Hery Diaz is a small time gangster, who takes part in robberies with a local gang known only as "The Sesame Street Gang". Hitting small towns here and there has gotten him where he is today: a 6-0 record. And after unleashing an early attack upon one hood by racking up 18.20 points in one night...this time, I'm afraid he has attacked the wrong area.

Out of the dust rises a crime lord by the name of Reece but only those who know what's good for them call him "The Heartbreak Kid". This Heartbreak Kid closely resembles Kermit the Frog...in a twisted, fantasy football cover story kind of way. Along with this "Kermit" are two other gangsters who have set their
sights a bit higher for their division. His two partners, Gonzo (The Sons of Thunder) & Animal (Prophets 'n' Kings) wish to kill off everyone else involved in
this robbery, and slowly start to climb up through the hierarchy of the
Mob to completely eliminate the East side of Division 1.

Hery calls upon his own division this week, being week 7. But will it truly be enough? This week is truly the battle of divisions, gentlemen. Is Hery really willing to continue to throw his fellow division-mates under the bus or will he finally step up and cheer them on? Only time will tell. And this weekend, may I be so bold to predict...West will DEMOLISH the East & The Muppet Fellas will continue to reign supreme. And as for Hery & his Sesame Street Gang? Well, I think you can see what happens when he messes with Kermit & crew.

So, the popular peacemaker question may be asked:

Why must we fight? I mean, we should solve our differences in a non-violent manner, right? That is a lesson I learned from Elmo. When all else fails, however, we should break things. That is a lesson I learned from Animal.

May the best division win & may Sesame Street's crew forever be stomped. I'm sorry, but 6-1, 3-4, 2-5, and 1-6 are coming up quicker than you can even say "cookies". And I think we all know who resembles cookie monster with that quote.

Leggo,


-JB

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

You guys always give me crap for my superstitious ways, but the story you’re about to hear is true. And kids…feel free to try this at home.  #weeksix

The True Mexican Stand Off

Since the beginning, The Educators have relentlessly hunted down The Gotham Knights & The Sith, the Sesame Street Gang has kept in gunslingin strides with The Heartbreak Kid. The Sons of Thunder plot in secret, ready to take out one side or the other. But who are the merciless Outlaws, willing to gun down anyone? Could it be Ghostface Vilma or Limited Edition? Or could the ultimate killer be playing it cool, resting and waiting until nobody suspects him...and then BOOM! Will The Bane rise to surprise them all? To find out who will have the true six shooters of week six but with minds as ammo, we'll just have to wait until tomorrow night.

Now the real Sheriff has decided to settle things once and for all in his own way. He has written a name on one single bullet. That name, this week...is Dan Martinez. No volcanic gun will ever be able to get you out of this one, homey. And don't pretend to be my deputy like that one time...I know how you do. In reality, you're no better than the rest of these outlaws. Until that clock strikes noon and those bells chime...be ready to draw (and I ain't talkin no math figures)!!


Anybody up for a week of Bang!? See ya'll in the Wild, Wild West.

-JB

Kill the Big Bird

I agree with Mitt Romney on at least one thing: We must kill big bird.

For those who aren't aware, Romney suggested that PBS be cut government funding to avoid borrowing more money from China.

Big Bird is an idea. Sesame street used to be the avenue of the common man. In recent year however, massive immigration issues and an influx of borrowed power have gone to this bird's head. It's time for change America. The imported imperial rug must be pulled from under the arrogant feet of this overstuffed pigeon. His success is built on the broken trust of prophets and kings, and laced with the deceitful jargon of trade. America, remember your roots. I believe the big bird would serve us all much better stuffed and slow roasted next to the cranberry sauce and yams.

- Bane

Tuesday Morning Hangovers...

This was a pretty low scoring week all around, so after a few “What the flip!?” “Dag gummit!” and the priceless, “I hate fantasy football” Week five is in the books…

"I Will Follow You, Wherever You Go"

If only I had time to turn on the light and expose the dark side of things... I would share this story. I might later, but the picture pretty much explains itself. Let's just keep in mind that the "undefeated" BatBoy was defeated by the Winless Rabbi, last week, and I'll continue to keep this thing rolling. The Dark Side is shared by both entities, and the entire Empire may choose to fall altogether this weekend. It is in the hands of the Sith to defend their honor... but as you can see... his hands are a little occupied at the moment! lol

Dwarf Vader has continued his campaign all over town, "Don't Underestimate the Dark Side." You may have seen his posters with this tag-line all over schools, hospitals, and bathrooms. Let me share something with you bro, that might save you a little time and money... "We got you! We know!" I can honestly say that we never underestimated you, period. We actually did the opposite and overestimated you! But don't worry though. We won't make the same mistake again. We will honor you credit you well deserve. Just try to get a win before the season ends.

Teacher

The Truth About Trades...

Meet Hery Diaz. GM of the Sesame Street Gang (and hypothetical owner of the Miami Heat).

A few weeks ago, Mr. Diaz-Riley wrote a fantastic piece on the importance of trading in a fourteen week season of fantasy football. Siquel and Ebert gave it a “two spell checks” up! I hyphen Pat Riley to Hery Diaz’s name because of the similarities they share. If Hery could wear Italian suits, he would…if he could slick his hair (which he’s probably tried) he would…and if he could get away with telling you half the truth, he would…

Trades are designed to enhance your team. Correct. However here’s what Hery Diaz-Riley didn’t tell you in his “truth about trades”…

Tuesday Morning Hangovers...

Ladies and girls! For the first time ever in NFL history, last night: a quarterback threw a game winning interception!!! *Que the Asian dancers* - this is the type of silly season we’ve been having… #weekfour

I Feel Ya Homie...

Flashback: And just think bro... you hid this from your facebook hoping these days were over hahaha Good Game Buster!!

The Dempsey Conspiracy!

This year is like no other, as we approach our 4th week of the season. We've seen things go down that would make you wanna head for the hills and vent on Twitter. We've seen that infamous "Game Winning Interception," Historical Upsets, "Space Filler" GMs starting 3-0, and trades Galore!! Its Total CHAOS!!! And what do these signs point to....? The one and only True Fantasy Deception - "The Dempsy Conspiracy!!"

I feel you homie...(Dan)

Tuesday Morning Hangovers...

All it took was one story and GM’s are willing to trade 3/4ths of your team…if I write a story on why we need videos, will you all suddenly start posting them???

Happy Heritage Month

Happy Sunday, Fellas! It's another day of football, back to our routine for the game. Some of us make the best of it by huddling up each weekend for the fun! Sadly, some of us are stuck behind the grind of work, or just oversleeping each week (Justin lol). Either way, this week should be a little bit different. This month highlights the celebration of the Hispanic heritage influenced in our country. The beautiful fact is that we all get to live and kick it together, no matter where we're from or who we are. I still would not be surprised if Reece was an intern for the FBI, or an undercover agent. But we are all Boys! He can still tryout for the comeback of The Village People as the officer.

Tuesday Morning Hangovers...

Welcome to my debate desk and after week two I feel (as Stephen A. Smith says) "so DISRESPECTED." I've got nothing rave about this week so you'll have to deal with my tangents!! And while I'm irrate and at it, (this is the perfect time to throw someone under the bus) Favre stilllllllllllllllllllllll sucks!!!  #weektwo

Trading 101

How to do a trade...... trading 101

We are at week 3 of the nfl! and for some of our owners it feels like week 12 wishing they can go back to the draft, but there is something that was created for all mankind.

 TRADING!!

But we are all scared of doing trades except for dan! (good last trade). So i thought i would do a talk on how and why doing trades are good instead of going to the waiver wire constanly (sith)

To do a trade is simple.

Nathan's Overly Protective!

Nathan, Nathan, Nathan... Loosen up a bit homie. Take your business major and finally do something productive with it by checking the numbers on your roster. This dude has 3 Defenses on his squad, and this follows up a case of him having 2 kickers. C'mon Man!! I thought you knew what you were doing in this league...? You better get your $200 bucks back from the little Fantasy Football Roster Simulator you bought and start playing this game yourself. If you haven't learned a lesson from the Terminator and Hery's Spell Check, You Can't Trust Machines!! So get that Jock of your face and let's go!!!

Respectfully,
Your Teacher

The Danahan

The Danahan is at it again. Take a guess at what his vote was to reestablish roster limits. I guess that's why they call it a depth chart. He's got a stack of RBs taller than the dirty plates in Francois' sink. Stewart is sitting down there deeper than the bottom of Justin's bottle of conditioner.

- Bane

Every Superhero Has a Weakness

• Superheroes
• A supporting cast of recurring characters, including the hero's friends, co-workers and/or love interests, who may or may not know of the superhero's secret identity. Often the hero's personal relationships are complicated by this dual life, a common theme in stories.

     "A bunch of grown men watching other grown men," says the majority of the female gender when it comes not only to fantasy football, but football in general. The irony in that comment is that most homosexual men could care less about football teams and the essence of competing. And although I just contradicted myself by making that generalization as well, I still think I just sharpened my point.
     Band of Brothers & The Pacific. If you haven't seen these two sets of series from HBO, then you have missed out on some MAJOR manly feelings, my brothers. Let me sum up this post's theme in one NFL figure: Ray Lewis. I don't think I need to explain what he does out there on the football field. Just search any type of YouTube video of his speech's and you will get the manly jitters and shivers.
     Leadership as a team of young men, this is why we do what we do. This is why we consistently compete with one another. To edge each other on, to encourage one another, and to mutually respect each other as men: these are the keys to any successful group. And no matter how many losses we obtain over the season, to swallow that horse pill-sized portion of humility will be the hardest thing to do. For even a superhero, with superhuman power, will fail and fall short. It happens with every single superhero in every comic but what makes the hero so super is the resiliency. To get back up after a loss, whether it be a close friend, family member, or even a spouse through divorce, even a fantasy football game...this is what defines a man.
     So men, this I challenge you (although a week late): through all of the smack talk, frustrating moments, burnt pizzas, and hurt feelings because your life is hectic and you are just too emotionally weak to care about your friends let alone some stupid fantasy football game...let us respect one another in all that we carry on in this league. I know that I am just a rookie and that this is my first time getting up to speak of such fantasy league topics but let me give you a heavy dose of reality.
     This is just fantasy and although the overall goal is to win every single game, don't sweat it when you lose. There are more important things in life such as your wife/future wife, future kids, completing your education, your career, and most importantly your spiritual life with Jesus Christ. So, when I appear to not necessarily care as much about this league as I should, please be patient with me. Although this is fun for me and I have gained nine other soon-to-be-if-not-already great friends & brothers, I am going to admit right now in Week 2 that this league isn't the number one priority for me & I pray to God that it isn't yours either.
     "Way to take the wind out of our sails," you may be thinking. I'm no minister & I'm no holy roller, I'm just a young Christian man who struggles with a lot of the same things you, my other fellas, struggle with as well on a regular basis. And sometimes it is good to just take a break and see things for what they truly are. On that note, good luck on your games this weekend!





Prophets & Kings' (oh, the irony of this team name with this post, lol!) Team Owner & Manager,



- Jonathan Brassington

...For Dan and Steve...

~Bishop

We all make mistakes. (Matt Ryan, RG3, CJ Spiller, Stevan Ridley, Fred Jackson)

Here's a little encouragement for Week 2

Tuesday Morning Hangovers...

Week one is officially in the books! Some GM's still are experiencing the honeymoon of #FF while others have seen their team come home, sit on the couch and become fat...welcome to the "reality" of fantasy football. 

Draft/Projections

Just a few facts to ponder christians:

In Week 1,

Our first round draft picks: (For all the Fabiano disciples, I've included his projected ranking)

Player Name - (Fabiano Position Ranking for Week 1) (Actual position ranking for Week 1)

Arian Foster - (1st) (7th)

LeSean McCoy - (2nd) (16th)

Ray Rice - (3rd) (3rd)

Aaron Rodgers - (1st) (5th)

Tom Brady - (3rd) (12th)

Chris Johnson - (6th) (31st)

Drew Brees - (2nd) (4th)

Cam Newton - (5th) (19th)

Calvin Johnson - (1st) (22nd)

Matthew Stafford - (4th) (20th)

Get Hype...the Season Starts Now

I would follow this man into battle... 

Welcome Back

Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, chickens and ducks,

It has begun (technically, but can we actually count Hery and Nathan's squabble on Wednesday?). Football happens on Sunday. Sunday is the day of fingernails and feasting. There are more prayers said by fantasy football GMs than in the Baptist pews. I welcome you to the warmth of laptops overheating and eye-straining that might someday force Francois to put actual lenses in his glasses. I welcome you to late night trade talk with Dan and and the ESL training you will all receive from reading his posts. I welcome you to a league where trophies are taken hostage and egos are crushed. Welcome to the land of golden opportunity. This is football. Do your research. Play well. Somebody please trade me for Blount. Let the games begin.


-The Bane

Tuesday Morning Hangovers...

I know we did draft a little early this year but the message boards are kind of dry…like Tombstone, Arizona dry…(except this league is full of females so there’s neither Earps or Clantons) and if the only thing to read is “Hangovers” I’m going to have to start signing off as Doc Holliday… 

The Elite 2012

Tuesday Morning Hangovers...

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year…with the kids wavier stalking and everyone talking be of good cheer...it's the most wonderful time of the year” 

This is how decide the last spot in our league...

For the most part our league consists of the same eight or so players: Heartbreak Kid, Orange Crush, The Bane, Educators, Sesame Street Gang, Gotham Knights, Sons of Thunder, The Sith and Limited Edition. However every year (for the past seven years) we've never had a set in stone guy...so this is what we do (except we usually take the guy who goes for the scissors first, lol) #competitive 

Who DOESN'T want this guy this year...