Tuesday Morning Hangovers

Each year, it becomes more challenging to find time each week to write these...but here I am. #weektwo

Rave of the Week

I love writing. Whether it's read or not makes no difference to me.* I write to myself all the time. It's been a long time since my last post and yet, it feels like just yesterday I was writing about how Antonio Brown is becoming my new favorite player that I'll never get to own. (That's a hint, Owen)

The same is true of this fictional game of pigskin. Returning to waking up Sunday morning to set my roster felt like any other weekend this entire year. Everything falls back into place when autumn begins (another topic for another day). However, we study this game prior to the start of every season because in the same way that nothing changes, everything can change. In a similar way to the NFL, a lot can change over the course of the off-season in the Elite. If the activity section of our league Home page contained “off-season transactions” it would look something like this…

+ HBK has traded NE for KC

+ The Bane has added a fiancée & home

+ GK has added 2 kid (s)!

+ SSG added a picture of a rock to his IG (and gets 1,000+ likes)

- The Elite drops standard league scoring

The list goes on…

All the above are true (except the rumor that Darius is really Francois).* The only thing consistent in life is change. There have been many changes heading into this season just as there will be at the start of next season, too. Embrace it. Celebrate it. Roll with the punches, too. It's a much easier ride when you do. After all these years, surely you no longer get upset when you discover one of the players on your team was injured because they literally ran as hard as they could into another player, right?

Rant of the Week

All credit goes to Steven for finding this one, boys. If you're reading this, stop reading it and follow these instructions. On the Home page, select the "My Team" and under that, click on "trading block."

Observe:

Please note: if you'd like to make a trade with me this season, always visit this page, first. [Reread again, if necessary] I hope we can all put this into effective use for 2016 and beyond. Also, it's my duty to make sure that we're all on the same page for what these four words mean for all of us.

On The Block: this does not mean, you-can-rip-me-off-for-this-player...it means, "of the 15 players or positions on my roster, these are those I'm most inclined to trade away for the right price." Thanks.

Untouchable: my guy is not for sale. I don't care how many players you offer, stats you share or text messages you send me...I stubbornly choose to keep this player till Jesus comes or the season ends.

Interested: [spoiler alert] we all became interested in running backs after round three in draft ended. If you're really wanting to get rid of a tight end, but I'm not interested in a tight end, don't offer me him.

Available: means I over-drafted a position or I picked up this player off waivers to deliberately keep him away from you so that you have no choice but to trade with me. Oh, I crossed out that last part because that doesn't happen in the Elite, just other leagues. If you need a specific position, talk to me.

Isn't this wonderful? How many texts, time and titters** can be saved by simply visiting this page before making a respectable offer to your opponent. I'm putting the invention of the trading block up there with the invention of
     
HBK***

*I wrote this last night, but didn't post it till this AM so waivers wouldn't hide it. Please read this.
**Ten years later and I still have no idea who Darius is...but he's won a belt so I guess he can stay.
***titters is a real word, but more importantly, I really wanted to stick with a "t" as I was on a roll.

****I know, no “I’m out like…” that’s so 2015, guys…it's a new decade in the Elite.