A Fantasy Football Letter to Daniel-Son

 Dear Dan III - 

It’s only dawned on me based upon recent events that one day your Dad will share with you the game we all love and play (from the sidelines), “football.” It’s a wonderful game where you basically run into another human being as hard as possible. Also, if this game doesn’t exist anymore due to some yet-to-be-discovered health risk, let the record show I’m surprised either. 

Now I don’t know how old you are or what Google search has to lead you to this post, but it’s safe to assume you’re able to read. Also, I’m not sure if you believe in Santa or not, but I’m not going to ruin your innocence either. 

The purpose of this future dated article is because as you grow up, you are primarily dependent on your father for everything you know*. I imagine your head is full of beliefs such as your Dad used to be a “stud*,” used to look like “The Rock*” and pretty much everything centers around life in both the late nineteen hundreds* and early two-thousands. I’m sure you get the point… 

However, the focus of this article is on the subject of fantasy football, which I’m sure your Dad has mentioned that he’s never lost* a game, or missed the playoffs* in a season and that he wins it all* every year. For the record, I don’t blame him. You want your son to think of you as a type of hero, but there are some things in life that simply are not no matter how hard we may try to fly* like Superman. (He does have his own website though) 

It’s highly tempting to discuss that first-place winner in 2012, but let’s just talk about your Dad for now. He has lost a weekly match-up. He has missed the playoffs. He’s even lost in the Super Bowl to that same first-place winner above and he’s definitely 0-3 so far in 2021. Again, he’s got a lot of fatherly qualities I’m sure you’ve appreciated, but accurate stories aren’t one of them. Please feel free to reach out with any other Qs you may have about Pops. 

Love, 

Uncle Reece (aka HBK)

*Now that is a very scary thought… 

**An old term no one uses anymore

***A super old dude by the time you’re able to read this

****We’re equally as old but not as cool as the guy above

*****https://did-dan-lose.mystrikingly.com/ 

******I’m now convinced that is what he tells your Mother 

*******You wouldn’t be the first little boy to try it

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

Years ago I'd create custom pics for my articles, now I'm just going to post pics of Mahomes

“Mike Evans is sick so you might want to consider starting someone else…” Mausharie #weekone

Tuesday Morning Hangovers

“I’d take a Chiefs win over a fantasy win, but can’t I have both?” – Steven #weekone

Winner's Circle Shipping Week

Recap of Winners Weeks 1-5:

(ALL PRIZES WILL BE SHIPPED THIS WEEK VIA USPS)

Week 1 Winners:

$5 Nike Gift Card:   

• Francois (already acquired digitally)

TeenyMates Locker Room Set:

• Steven
• Nathan
•  Austin
• Francois
•  Justin

Week 2 Winners:

$5 Taco Bell Gift Card:

• Reece
• Francois
• Owen
• Steven
• Austin

A Football Life: Season One:

• Owen

Week 3 Winners:

$15 Starbucks Gift Card:

• Francois
• Austin

Marvel Avengers Plush Pillow:

• Owen
• Dan

Week 4 Winners:

Lecrae's 'All Things Work Together' Album & Autographed Poster:

• Justin

Olive Garden Gift Card:

• Dan

Week 5 Winners:

Armchair QB Trophy:

• Steven

Best Buy Gift Cards (unless scores change):

• Maucus ($10)
• Henry ($10)
• Reece ($11)
• Austin ($13)
• Steven ($15)

(Owen will ship the prizes from week five, unless otherwise stated)

**PLEASE NOTE: THERE WILL BE NO PRIZES FOR WEEK SIX DUE TO SHIPPING COSTS**

Week 5 Prize Reveal

Good football day to all and to all many points!

I told Jonathan that I wanted to sponsor the prizes for the week because I think it is awesome that he has been giving so much to this league and I wanted to help him out. Hopefully this continues to grow and each GM takes a turn at the prize pool and leaves their personal mark.  Everyone but myself is eligible for the below prizes. 

Prize #1
I found an armchair quarterback trophy for the person who has the highest scoring starting QB and WR1 combo. This is specifically the WR in the 1st slot on your roster.


Prize #2 4
Is a best buy gift card for $10, but with an additional $1 for every full 10 points that you beat your opponent. Fractions of 10 will not count ie Team A scores 100.1 and Team B scores 110 does not entitle team B to an additional dollar.


Good luck and have fun!!

Official Week 4 Prize Reveal

EDITOR'S NOTE:

 Please excuse this week's perceived laziness on my part as I had a three-part story written for the sole purpose of this week's prize. However, my Mac computer died this week. I had written the story on Lecrae, the 116 clique movement, Reach Records, Christian rap, and the overall influence it has had in my life, my experiences in music production and journalism, and how it has overall brought me closer to Christ. There were other loose ends to the story that tie up in the concluding trilogy, involving the national movement of kneeling during the anthem and the fact that I am no longer SDA. Once I have the story transferred from my dead Mac's hard drive, I will have the story posted. My prediction is that Lecrae earns his third Grammy award with this album. And even if you don't like the genre and don't win it this weekend, I encourage you to give this album a listen on Spotify, Apple music, Google Play, etc.

IF you win your week four matchup AND have the highest scoring kicker, you receive:

• One 'All Things Work Together' Album & Autographed Poster

IF you win the 'creative alternative team name' poll, you receive:

• One Olive Garden Gift Card

ELV - Week 3: Fantasy Soars

Suggestion Box

It is now week three and I would very much like any suggestions, comments, critiques you may have on my future creative content.

No, this is not a time to be a cynic and instigate issues for your own agenda.

If you are going to suggest something, feel free to shoot me a text. You all have my personal number. 

I will definitely make necessary changes to the content I create with your added, valued suggestions.

Thank you and play on!

Doppelgängers

Gentlemen,

It is time to play a little game.

Who realistically looks like a famous celebrity, athlete, musician, or even a common person?

Round 1:

Post a picture of who you think you look like?

Round 2:

Post a picture of who people have said you look like?

Round 3:

Choose a fellow GM and post a picture as to who you think they look like?

(This final round can be a great excuse for taking shots and smack talks)

Let me start:

1. Gordon Hayward

(I think I look like him just because of my current hairstyle and facial hair)

2. Macaulay Culkin

(An endless count of people have told me that I look like this buster)

3. Owen Hansen/Bradley Cooper

(Reminded me SO much of Bradley Cooper in American Sniper)

Official Week 3 Prize Reveal

IF you are atop your division after week three, you receive:

• One $15 Starbucks Gift Card

IF your combined team (starters & bench) score the top two accumulated point totals for week three, you receive:

• One Marvel Avengers Plush Throw Blanket